Six years later...

July 7, 2013 Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

July 9, 2007 Karaganda, Kazakhstan





Here's to the boy who added a little red to my life...

(photo credit: www.karenharrisonphotography.com)

"Red is my favorite color, " says Arman proudly. He loves to wear red clothes, play with red cars, ride his red bike, and paint everything and anything red. I dress in black, gray, and maybe, occasionally, a bit of blue (hey, I lived in Manhattan for more than 20 years!). Before Arman, I would never have owned a red car or worn a red dress. So here's a big thank you to the boy who added a little red to my otherwise gray life.

Sure, sometimes red is for anger: motherhood made me realize that I needed to deal with my bad temper (and I am still working on it).
Sometimes red is for STOP: I find myself saying it a lot more than I care to admit.
And, yes, sometimes red is the color my face turns when I blush with embarassment, like the time Arman yelled out, "stop touching my penis" as I was changing his diaper in a crowded rest-stop bathroom somewhere on the New Jersey Turnpike.

But mostly, red is for LOVE. Arman has brought lots of that to my life since that memorable day four years ago.

So here's to the boy who smiled broadly when Dr. Svetlana carried him into the playroom at the Shapagat Baby House in Karaganda, Kazakhstan on the morning of July 9, 2007.  And here's to me for realizing in an instant that "baby boy Arman, born December 1, 2006" wanted to be my son and for saying in a calm, firm voice: "этот" Russian for "this one."  Here's to us for choosing each other and falling in love...

Here's to the boy whose presence transformed my future and forever changed the way I view my past. I used to waste a lot of time considering how different my life would have been if I had gone to a different school, taken a different job, tried a little harder to make a certain romantic relationship work, moved to a different place... But after adopting Arman, I realized that if one thing in the prior 46 years had been the slightest bit different, then perhaps I wouldn't have been standing in that baby house in Karaganda at 10 am on July 9th, 2007 waiting to meet four babies. If one little detail in my past had been altered, ever so slightly, then maybe Arman would have been the first child brought into the room that morning instead of the fourth. And maybe, just maybe,  I wouldn't have seen his beautiful smile in quite the same way. Maybe I would have missed out on one of the most profound moments of my life: the chance to be Arman's mama. I might have missed out on the chance for him to add a little bit of red to my otherwise gray life.


Hey, wait, wait,  hold on a second, did Arman bring red to my life or is it possible that I brought red to his? Looking at earlier blog posts, I recall that the first time I was photographed holding Arman (just minutes after we met), he seemed a little nervous and shy.

A few days later, after he spit up on his clothes, I snuck a Cornell t-shirt onto Arman - see how happy he looks in this photo? 

The first article of clothing that belonged to him was RED!!!!  (The caregivers in Room #3 washed that shirt and dressed Arman in it for almost all of my twice-daily visits after that.)  Soooo, was red already Arman's favorite color or did red become his favorite color when I dressed him in the Cornell shirt?  I guess we'll never really know... 


So here's to the boy who reminds me every single day that two of the most important questions we can ask are "why" and "why not?" and that it's okay to answer with "I don't know" especially when it is followed by "but let's find out together."


Here's to the boy who joyfully jumps in puddles, asks when he'll be allowed to ride a skateboard, wants the swing to go as high as possible, and insists he is not tired, even as he is falling asleep.


Here's to the boy who learned to sit up at 10 months old and taught himself to ride a two-wheeler at 4 1/2 years old.  (I think we can now safely conclude that Arman's gross motor skills are not only on target, but actually advanced for his age.)


Here's to the boy who builds, draws, imagines, and sees things in our world that are often beyond my comprehension.


Here's to the boy who puts up with my singing, loves to hear a good story, laughs more than he cries, and gets up every time he falls down.


Here's to the boy who has been more resilient in the first four years of his life than anyone should be expected to be in a lifetime.

So hip, hip, hooray (as Arman likes to say), here's to Arman, here's to love, here's to us celebrating July 9th, 2011 - the 4th anniversary of the day we met - and here's hoping we have at least 44 more anniversaries to celebrate together!

(photo credit: www.karenharrisonphotography.com)

Two and more!

Arman turned 2 on December 1st (these photos were taken in December of 2008). He is a happy, healthy, funny toddler who loves cars, trucks, helicopters, and other things that go!

I have not posted to this blog for a very long time. I had intended to keep it going after I brought Arman home, but you know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and men. I decided to make this addition to Arman's adoption blog because I have been giving the link to people when they ask to hear about my experience working with Children at Heart Adoption Services (I wholeheartedly recommend them, by the way). When I re-read the blog recently, I realized that I never posted a photo of Arman with my mom and dad. The family photo above is with my mom, dad, and my brother Paul. There are so many other photos I could post, but for now, I will limit myself to these two.

Arman and I moved to Manhattan in July, 2008 (he's gotten quite good at hailing a cab); this photo of Arman and me was taken in front of the Rock Center Christmas tree (thanks to Madi for taking the photo).

I am grateful to Janice and Kathy at Children at Heart and all the people at Shapagat Baby House in Karaganda, Kazakhstan who helped care for Arman and helped me adopt him. I am happy to answer any questions you may have about the adoption process and working with Children at Heart.

Arman's first Halloween!

I know I haven't posted since September, but hey, I was waiting for someone to take a good picture of Arman and me! I know, I know, you all just want to see cute photos of him, NOT me...

I'll try to go back and fill in the blanks with posts about what has been happening over the past two months. In the meantime, enjoy this photo from the Andes Harvest Moon Ball on October 27th when Arman was dressed as a puppy. Photo credit to Jim Koch (thank you!) the official photographer of all events in Andes, NY.

I have a dream...

 
I have a dream and he is here in my arms…
 
I have a dream and he is nine months old today, September 1st…
 
I have a dream and he dreams of meeting you all…
 

Arman, the name chosen by his birth mother, means “a dream” in Kazakh. The Kazakhstanis pronounce the name Arman with a rolled “r” – my advice for saying it in the U.S. is to pretend you are going to say “Armani” (like the designer), but leave off the “e” sound at the end. He will probably know who you are referring to whether you say “ar-MAHN” or “AR-min” – I wouldn’t fret about it too much.

We are home in Ithaca and would love to see you!

Many thanks to Julianna for taking the photos on this blog entry.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 <

Ithaca! making friends, getting presents, strolling around town

We drove home from New York to Ithaca on August 29th and have been having a great time enjoying the presence and presents of friends. Thank you so much! The weather has been wonderful so we're spending lots of time in the back yard. We've also managed to find two playgrounds with bucket swings -- hooray!

It's nice to be home in Ithaca and we hope to see you here soon...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

having fun in Manhattan!

 

 

 

 

there's no place like home!

 

To Arman, they are legal guardians; to me, they are guardian angels! Can't tell you how good it was to see Annie and Peter when Arman and I came through immigration and customs. They helped us find the car in long-term parking, get Arman settled in his car seat for the first time (hey girls, your guess at the adjustments for the straps were right on target), and then drove us to their place in Manhattan (our home away from home). Arman got to meet Sam (in person) and Madi (by video/Skype) -- he's eager to meet Nick and Henry soon. He also had his first eye-to-eye with Lexi and Emma (the cats). Indian food and champagne capped off our homecoming and then we had a long sleep...